I will laugh at myself soon. I launched a blog without a plan. This is not what the professionals do. This is not even what I typically do.
Yep, I am Type A and like things organized and planned. However, I ignored all my conventional wisdom and just launched my blog page. I would never have done this a year ago.
Perhaps it’s because I was scared last year. Maybe it was because I used to think I had control (which I don’t!). It could be that I was trying to make everything perfect…now I am just doing it. There is freedom in this – and humor.
My husband asked me yesterday how often I would be posting. Not sure!
What is my theme? Unknown.
Have you drafted your first few posts? Nope.
But I have been dreaming of writing and sharing for years so I am just winging it. This would have panicked me in the past but now, as a 40-year-old, brain surgery survivor, I’m just writing when I feel like it. I predict a plan in a few months, but until then, I’ll just see what happens. This is bound to be an exhilarating yet terrifying journey!
I stopped planning and have just been going along for the ride of life. I sometimes stress about this as I don’t even know what’s on tap for the following day…but lately, it’s just how life has been going. Recovery and transition back to real life has been slow in my head but quick in real life. I’ve tried to slow down to figure out what helps my recovery the most.
I’ve easily found that being with my kids and family time is key. I am also feeling like one-on-one time or small groups seems to work better for me lately. I haven’t been reaching out to some my closest friends like I used to but I am working on that. I’ve found myself avoiding large gatherings and parties as I just haven’t felt comfortable going. I am also working on this.
A fantastic therapy for me is the feeling I get when I help others. This is why I found myself at a charity beer tasting last night with 90 people….and I was one of the hosts!
Seemingly out of nowhere, I have partnered with two local moms-who are also passionate about heart disease and stroke- to work together as Sisters@Heart. Each with stories of their own, we all want to give back to the American Heart Association. Together we are bonding as we muddle our way through our health challenges.
Honestly, I planned to give myself a year before jumping into any big obligations. I wanted to be well and strong before committing to any new endeavors. But life sometimes has other plans. The idea of Sisters@Heart was born and we have taken off. We are raising awareness and funds for the American Heart Association.
I didn’t want to ask people for anything else after all the help and support I received in the past few months. However, I am not raising money for me but for others who need it- people who need the research and technology that someone else funded years ago to save my life this year.
Back to last night…I was a nervous wreck to put myself out there- literally at the bar and figuratively as a partner of Sisters@Heart. We had received an amazing response of people who purchased tickets and gave us encouraging words. Yet leaving my couch and the comfort of my quiet home scared me, yet also thrilled me. Nervously, I prepared for the night reminding myself that I needed to be there for my friends- Jamie and Caitlyn who planned the event with me….and all those who were coming to support us.
I sure am glad that I did! I had a ton of fun and felt the energy and spirit of a group of compassionate, giving and fun people. We tasted beer, chatted with friends, bought raffles and just had a lively night for a good cause on a cold Wednesday. Going with the flow seems to be working for me right now!